I'm taking the day off! I love it that it's 10:07 a.m. and I'm sitting at home. My poor students are at the mercy of some random substitute teacher that may or may not know what he or she is doing. I've left them enough work to last several day, so if it's a smart sub, s/he has put them to work.
I'm usually never absent. This is actually my second absence this year, which my kids pointed out yesterday when I told them I wasn't going to be there today. They wanted to know WHY I wasn't going to be there. I told them I "had a meeting," which is not true. I love that the meeting just happened to make it on a Friday so I could have a 3-day long weekend. They seemed worried that I wasn't going to be there. A day with a sub can be a fun or a terrible day. I gave them a little spiel about how I expect them to still follow the class routines and be responsible even though I'm not there, that this is a time to prove their trustworthiness...blah, blah, blah. Then I opened it up to a little Q and A, which was a mistake.
Student 1: Do you know who the sub is going to be?
Me: No idea.
Student 1: I hope it's Mrs. Robeson because last time you were absent, she let us sing and dance to "Soulja Boy."
Me: Terrific.
Student 2: What if the sub tells us to do something one way, but you usually tell us to do it another?
Me: Do what the sub tells you to do.
Student 2: What if we get in trouble for doing it your way?
Me: Do what the sub tells you to do.
Student 2: What if the sub doesn't let us have Friday free time?
Me: I've left instructions all about Friday free time, but do what the sub tells you to do.
Student 3: What if aliens land outside and the sub doesn't do anything?
Me: Use your best judgment.
Student 3: What?
Me: Try to get a picture of the aliens and then run.
Student 4: I'm going to miss you, Ms. M.
Me: Thanks! That's nice to hear!
Student 5: What if the sub says we did something, but we really didn't do it and we get in trouble for it.
Me: That seems to happen all the time with you. Deal with it.
Student 5: But....
Me: DEAL with it!
Student 6: If something happens, can we write you a note telling you all about it and leave it on your desk?
Me: No.
At this point I closed the Q & A session as all the "What ifs" could've dragged it on FOREVER (literally).
So we'll see how it went when I return on Monday, but knowing kids, after 2 days off, they will have forgotten all about it by then (or at least one can only hope).
Friday, November 30, 2007
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
Energizer Bunnies
I think all of my students have Tourettes Syndrome. Okay, that's probably a terrible thing to say, but I swear to god, they cannot sit still for even one minute. They are constantly twitching, tapping, fidgeting, or in some other way moving.
Today some of the kids presented their science fair projects. (On a side note, I HATED science fair projects when I was in school...now I LOVE them! When you don't have to actually do one, the process is really fun!). So while one child was up in front of the room, I sat at their desk to listen to their presentation and grade them.
If you're a teacher, I highly recommend sitting at a student's desk occasionally. It gives you a perspective of your classroom you've never had before. It also gives you an idea of how the student usually sees you. It's weird.
Aaaaanyway, we were all listenting to a student's science presentation when I looked around the room at all the children. Every single one of them was moving in some way. Half of them weren't seated on their butts, either. They were either standing, sitting on their knees (ow!), sitting with one foot underneath their butt, or they were half up-half down out of their chairs (leaning on their desks). It makes me wonder: when does this change?
If you look at adults, we move as little as possible. (It's almost kind of sad how little some adults move!) There are also few or no adults who would sit on a chair in some other way than on their butts. And running? Forget it. When was the last time you ran (and not for exercise or because you absolutely had to)? Kids, though, they would run everywhere if you let them! Do you know how many times a day I say "Stop running" or "Walk"? At least a dozen. At least.
Part of what I love about kids is their energy, but I just wish I could turn it off sometimes! I mean, is five minutes of stillness a day too much to ask?
Today some of the kids presented their science fair projects. (On a side note, I HATED science fair projects when I was in school...now I LOVE them! When you don't have to actually do one, the process is really fun!). So while one child was up in front of the room, I sat at their desk to listen to their presentation and grade them.
If you're a teacher, I highly recommend sitting at a student's desk occasionally. It gives you a perspective of your classroom you've never had before. It also gives you an idea of how the student usually sees you. It's weird.
Aaaaanyway, we were all listenting to a student's science presentation when I looked around the room at all the children. Every single one of them was moving in some way. Half of them weren't seated on their butts, either. They were either standing, sitting on their knees (ow!), sitting with one foot underneath their butt, or they were half up-half down out of their chairs (leaning on their desks). It makes me wonder: when does this change?
If you look at adults, we move as little as possible. (It's almost kind of sad how little some adults move!) There are also few or no adults who would sit on a chair in some other way than on their butts. And running? Forget it. When was the last time you ran (and not for exercise or because you absolutely had to)? Kids, though, they would run everywhere if you let them! Do you know how many times a day I say "Stop running" or "Walk"? At least a dozen. At least.
Part of what I love about kids is their energy, but I just wish I could turn it off sometimes! I mean, is five minutes of stillness a day too much to ask?
Monday, November 26, 2007
Gotta Take a Call
I have nothing new to report today except my theory that the more days off of work you have, the more you want. 4 days just isn't enough. Twenty work days until winter break! Then I have 2 full weeks off!!!
So since I have nothing to add today, I will dig into my past and pull out a story. If you've known me for longer than 2 years, then you know that I haven't always worked at my current school. I've worked at some crazy-ass schools with some real whack-jobs.
I'll tell you my husband's absolute FAVORITE school story.
So I used to teach this crazy kid. We'll call him David. David was a pain in my you-know-what and his mother was even worse. She thought David could do absolutely no wrong, but he was the terror of my 4th grade classroom about 5 years ago. I always read to my students after lunch. Kids (usually) like to be read to so they are (usually) quiet and attentive. So there I am reading one of my favorite books to read aloud, "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory." While I read, I circulate around the room so as to keep everybody engaged. Everybody was quiet...except David. I notice that he is "talking to himself." So I walk towards his desk while I continue to read. As I approach, I notice that he has his shoe next to his ear and is talking into it like it's a phone. I get right up next to him and keep reading. Now, a normal child would immediately stop when the teacher is not even a foot away from him. Not David. He continues to talk into his shoe-phone as if I'm not even there. I stop reading, bend down so I'm level with his ear (I don't want to draw any more attention to him than I have to), and say in my most stern-but-quiet voice, "Get that shoe back on your foot...RIGHT...NOW." I stand back up to start to read again, and David says into his shoe-phone, "Yeah...I gotta go."
So since I have nothing to add today, I will dig into my past and pull out a story. If you've known me for longer than 2 years, then you know that I haven't always worked at my current school. I've worked at some crazy-ass schools with some real whack-jobs.
I'll tell you my husband's absolute FAVORITE school story.
So I used to teach this crazy kid. We'll call him David. David was a pain in my you-know-what and his mother was even worse. She thought David could do absolutely no wrong, but he was the terror of my 4th grade classroom about 5 years ago. I always read to my students after lunch. Kids (usually) like to be read to so they are (usually) quiet and attentive. So there I am reading one of my favorite books to read aloud, "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory." While I read, I circulate around the room so as to keep everybody engaged. Everybody was quiet...except David. I notice that he is "talking to himself." So I walk towards his desk while I continue to read. As I approach, I notice that he has his shoe next to his ear and is talking into it like it's a phone. I get right up next to him and keep reading. Now, a normal child would immediately stop when the teacher is not even a foot away from him. Not David. He continues to talk into his shoe-phone as if I'm not even there. I stop reading, bend down so I'm level with his ear (I don't want to draw any more attention to him than I have to), and say in my most stern-but-quiet voice, "Get that shoe back on your foot...RIGHT...NOW." I stand back up to start to read again, and David says into his shoe-phone, "Yeah...I gotta go."
Saturday, November 24, 2007
Holiday Weekend
Parents,
Just so you know you, your child's teacher does NOT want to talk to you over Thanksgiving Break. She will, but she does not want to.
Friday (yesterday) was our 2nd day off, the first being Thanksgiving Day, and I had already received emails from TWO parents asking me questions about homework. Actually, the question from both was: What were the homework assignments because my kid forgot his homework agenda at school. Grrrr. Y'know what? Have your kid call one of his friends, that's what we used to do! OR, occasionally let your kid suffer the consequences of forgetting his homework instead of bailing him/her out each and every time.
I know parents do this out of love and out of fear of their child failing, and I understand that it is my job to communicate with parents. I truly do understand these things, but children need to learn responsibility and parents need to CHILL OUT. I've seen parents so fearful of their children failing that they will complete assignments FOR their children; They will leave work and drive to school to bring the forgotten homework; They will call people long-distance for help solving a word problem.
It's fourth grade, people. Get some perspective!
Just so you know you, your child's teacher does NOT want to talk to you over Thanksgiving Break. She will, but she does not want to.
Friday (yesterday) was our 2nd day off, the first being Thanksgiving Day, and I had already received emails from TWO parents asking me questions about homework. Actually, the question from both was: What were the homework assignments because my kid forgot his homework agenda at school. Grrrr. Y'know what? Have your kid call one of his friends, that's what we used to do! OR, occasionally let your kid suffer the consequences of forgetting his homework instead of bailing him/her out each and every time.
I know parents do this out of love and out of fear of their child failing, and I understand that it is my job to communicate with parents. I truly do understand these things, but children need to learn responsibility and parents need to CHILL OUT. I've seen parents so fearful of their children failing that they will complete assignments FOR their children; They will leave work and drive to school to bring the forgotten homework; They will call people long-distance for help solving a word problem.
It's fourth grade, people. Get some perspective!
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Being Thankful
With tomorrow being Thanksgiving, I did such a teacher thing today and had the kids share what they were thankful for before they left school. It was so cute (mostly).
Here are some things they were thankful for:
my parents
school
transportation (huh?)
"my 2 annoying sisters"
my life
my teachers (awww)
my grandma and grandpa
my cat
food
my clothes
the ability to dance
Tom Brady, QB of the New England Patriots
I'm glad they've got their priorities straight (mostly)!
Happy Thanksgiving!
Here are some things they were thankful for:
my parents
school
transportation (huh?)
"my 2 annoying sisters"
my life
my teachers (awww)
my grandma and grandpa
my cat
food
my clothes
the ability to dance
Tom Brady, QB of the New England Patriots
I'm glad they've got their priorities straight (mostly)!
Happy Thanksgiving!
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
I'm Old
Y'know what's weird? When a stranger comes up to at some random place like the grocery store and says, "Hi, Ms. ________." (I don't use my name in this blog). This leaves me in an awkward position because I can tell by the greeting that the person is a former student, but I have NO idea who they are because I haven't seen them in god-knows-how-many years. So then I just stare at them and try to figure out who the hell they are and how long ago I may have taught them. They finally take mercy on me and tell me. Then I fall into shock because the little dimpled boy I remember now has facial hair and piercings. (Not that there's anything wrong with that!)
It's scary to think that the first students I ever taught (4th graders) are now college-age. They're able to vote! Hopefully they've learned a bit more since the last time I saw them, because if they haven't, you definitely do NOT want these people voting. ( :
It's scary to think that the first students I ever taught (4th graders) are now college-age. They're able to vote! Hopefully they've learned a bit more since the last time I saw them, because if they haven't, you definitely do NOT want these people voting. ( :
Monday, November 19, 2007
"Computers"
So I was all set to vent about how annoying the parents of my students can be, but I just got an email from one of the parents that said, "I hope you and your family have a happy Thanksgiving holiday!" How am I supposed to bitch now?
Okay, I'll bitch about something else. Today my kids had computers. The class is called "computers," but the kids learn nothing about computers. Instead, they complete these academic quizzes for 40 minutes twice a week. It's sad, but what am I gonna do? Now I don't like to complain about other teachers since we're all on the same team, but what happened today was ridiculous! While my class was in computers, I was in my classroom grading papers. One of my students walked in. When I asked her why she was here, she told me that the computer teacher wouldn't let her use her kleenex. The teacher told her to come to the classroom to get a piece of kleenex so the girl could blow her nose! Are you kidding me? FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, LET THE KID USE A PIECE OF KLEENEX! Instead, the kid had to walk all the way to our classroom with her hand covering her nose.
This is the same teacher who, if a student's computer is not working for whatever reason, will not let them switch to an available working computer. She just makes them sit and read. WTF??? Your tax dollars at work!
Okay, I'll bitch about something else. Today my kids had computers. The class is called "computers," but the kids learn nothing about computers. Instead, they complete these academic quizzes for 40 minutes twice a week. It's sad, but what am I gonna do? Now I don't like to complain about other teachers since we're all on the same team, but what happened today was ridiculous! While my class was in computers, I was in my classroom grading papers. One of my students walked in. When I asked her why she was here, she told me that the computer teacher wouldn't let her use her kleenex. The teacher told her to come to the classroom to get a piece of kleenex so the girl could blow her nose! Are you kidding me? FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, LET THE KID USE A PIECE OF KLEENEX! Instead, the kid had to walk all the way to our classroom with her hand covering her nose.
This is the same teacher who, if a student's computer is not working for whatever reason, will not let them switch to an available working computer. She just makes them sit and read. WTF??? Your tax dollars at work!
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